Tag Archives: water birth

Fin(n)

Baby number five was to be my last. We were both agreed on this. Five was plenty to be getting on with,  it was time to look to the future and to life beyond pregnancy and babyhood. I signed up for a postgraduate course to update my skills and I hoped to get back into work soon.

Life decided otherwise.

In October 2016 I discovered that I was pregnant again. It was a huge shock. I didn’t know how I felt about it. I couldn’t talk to anyone about it. I couldn’t even bring myself to tell the husband. I ended up booking a private scan in secret and on my own just to make sure that it was a viable pregnancy in the right place. It was a few weeks after that before I felt ready to finally break the news to the husband. It’s a miracle I was able to hide it that long considering I was so sick I could barely lift my head most days.

It was 24 weeks in before we told our immediate families and our extended families  and many friends didn’t find out until 30 plus weeks. We never announced on Facebook so some people didn’t find out until last week when our beautiful, perfect third son made his way into the world.

I didn’t think I would ever be posting on this blog again but I want to share his birth story.

I went into this pregnancy as a grand-multipara and from the off they were going to treat my GBS status as positive (a swab would later on confirm that I was indeed GBS positive again). All of this meant I was destined for the labour ward again. I was okay with this. I expected it. I didn’t even raise the prospect with them of home birth or going to the midwife led unit. It didn’t seem like there was much point, so I settled myself with the thought of the labour ward. I was worried about a repeat of T’s birth, as being back to back I had found the whole process extremely long and very difficult. I had a lot of bad feelings about myself and how poorly I had handled it.

I spent a good portion of the third trimester making sure I sat up straight on the sofa or using my birthing ball to do everything I could to get baby into the right position. This was also the first pregnancy where I got to the end and I wasn’t desperately impatient to go into labour. Part of this might have been because my due date (same due date that I had with little A in fact) was just a few days after the kids would finish school for the summer, or that Big A suddenly developed another condition on top of her type 1 diabetes (Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome, if you’re interested). In the end I was the most pregnant I had ever been, 39+6.

I woke up that morning and around 10 o’clock the contractions started. They were uncomfortable but quite irregular, around 10 minutes apart. Sometimes they would get closer together but then they would space out again. Around one o’clock I decided that I would call fetal assessment and get them to check me out because of my GBS status. I went up and they checked me over. I was only 2cm and they placed the belt too high so it wasn’t picking up the contractions I was having. In the end the midwife said I was best going home for a bit and seeing how things went. My MIL was having her annual 4th of July barbecue (a day early). We decided to swing by that for a while and stock up on some protein.

The contractions continued, going to 3 minutes apart when I was standing up but spacing out again if I sat down. At five o’clock we decided to go back to the hospital again. At this point I was 3cm and they decided to admit me and give me my first dose of antibiotic. After this we were moved to the antenatal ward and told to wait there and give them a shout of we thought things were ramping out.

And things continued on as they had been until about 10.30 when suddenly a contraction hit me that made me jump off the bed and burst into tears. They suddenly started coming one on top of the other with barely a gap in between. The husband went to find a midwife as I held onto the bed trying to catch my breath between these furious contractions. A midwife appeared and examined me again and said I was now 6cm so they were going to take me round.

This was the shocking moment. She said they’d had some changes in their guidelines and even though I was a para 5 and GBS positive I could go to the midwife led unit AND they were filling the birthing pool for me. As they wheeled me round she said oh someone who knows you is in the MLU.

They wheeled us into the room and the midwife on duty was none other than a friend of mine! J is a fantastic midwife, she was heavily involved with the maternity liaison committee that I used to volunteer with. It really couldn’t have been more perfect. All the things that I had always wanted but I hadn’t dared to hope for this time and it was just coming together.

They quickly finished filling the pool and around 11 o’clock I got in. It felt marvelous. I could move about so easily (yes, SPD had got me yet again!) and the water was so soothing. I used gas and air and held onto the husband and just went with what my body was doing.

At 12 minutes to midnight our baby boy was born. He came out still inside his sack as my waters didn’t break until after his head was born. There was a little bit of meconium  in the waters but they weren’t concerned. I lifted him up out of the water myself and cuddled him to me. It was just magical.

It only took six attempts, but I got there in the end.

finn2

What do you need for a home birth?

I’m writing a lot of lists at the moment, lists of what I need for the baby and for the birth. I like writing lists. I get a bit anal about them. Every week before I go grocery shopping I write out my list, price it online and then I put it in the order that I’ll come across it in the store. It’s not enough to put it under sections like vegetables, it literally has to be written in the order these things are on the shelves.

I’m taking a similar approach to baby organising. I have the things I need written out in order of priority, some things we will need immediately, like a cot mattress, some things can wait a while, like a buggy board. Then there are all the things I need for the birth itself.

One question I frequently see asked on the Home Birthing board that I co-admin, is “What do I need for my home birth?”

Planning a home birth does involve a certain amount of shopping, but a hospital birth involves that too, there are just a few things you need to take into consideration when at home.

Where are you going to give birth? 

One of the beauties of birthing at home is that you can go with the flow. I have spoken with women who have given birth in their bedrooms, their bathrooms, in their hallways, their living rooms, even one who gave birth on the stairs, but it’s helpful beforehand to have an idea of which room you think you’ll want to give birth in.

For me it has always been the living room. It’s the biggest room in the house, has the most floor space, is easily accessible by the front or back door, and I never had to worry about the floor supporting the weight of a filled birthing pool. The idea of giving birth in my bedroom (which suggests bed and lying down) never appealed to me. I wanted to be able to retreat to my bed afterwards. I didn’t want to have to change gunk covered sheets first.

Whichever room you decide you want to give birth in, you’ll need something to protect the floor or any other surfaces that you think you might give birth on i.e. bed, sofa etc. A sheet of tarpaulin is good or several cheap shower curtains. In addition to that it’s helpful to have some of those big absorbent pads. You can use these to sit on, to cover a pillow that you are leaning on or to sit on your birthing ball. Your midwife (in the UK anyway) will probably have several of these in her kit, but I’ve always bought some of the Pampers care mats in advance of the birth and put them onto my bed on the off chance that my waters should break in the night (MUCH cheaper than buying a new mattress).

Ah it should be noted that there is a reasonable chance you will throw up while in labour. It’s a good idea to have something to catch it. A basin will do.

It also helps to have some (possibly old, possibly just cheap) sheets or bath towels. Primark and Matalan are excellent for these. You can bin them afterwards if you don’t feel like washing them, but should you (well not you, your partner or other willing person) stick them in the washing machine soon after the birth with a bit of soda crystals they will wash up very well.

Oh and don’t forget your camera. More importantly don’t forget to have someone well drilled in how to work the camera and WHEN they should use it. I have a real lack of photos from my home births which is a constant source of disappointment to me.

Are You Planning to Birth In Water? 

If you are planning a water birth, well obviously this may have a big effect on which room you decide to birth in, mostly because it’s best to be somewhere that isn’t too far from the taps. You also need to think about whether you plan to rent a birthing pool, or to buy one.

I bought a birthing pool. This was largely because it was vastly cheaper than renting one, and as I wasn’t sure if I was going to get the use the pool or not I didn’t want to spend several hundred pounds on it. Buying a pool has a few advantages, for one thing you can quite often re-sell it on ebay, or after a judicious cleaning with some milton you have either a fantastic paddling pool or ball pool for your little ones to play with. You can also re-use the pool should you have another birth. The La Bassine (which I have) is guaranteed for 10 births. Go forth and multiply indeed.

But there are several advantages to renting a pool too. A rented pool is likely to have sturdy sides (most bought pools are inflatable) and to have an internal heater/thermostat that will keep it at the right temperature. With an inflatable pool you will have to rely on a bath thermometer and buckets of hot water to keep it right.

But whatever pool you go for, you are likely to need most of the following:

  • Pool
  • Pump to inflate the pool
  • Submersible pump to empty the pool. Okay this is definitely optional but it is much less work than carrying buckets.
  • A debris net to remove any… floaters. A sieve bought from your local pound shop will do the job.
  • Bath thermometer to help you keep the pool at body temperature.
  • Pool liner
  • Heat retaining cover. This is another optional item, but can be especially handy with an inflatable pool, should you need/want to get out for any length of time.
  • A Mirror – you may want this so you can see the baby crowning, or for the midwife to examine you without having to get out of the water or be hands on.

 

What are Your Thoughts on Pain Relief? 

If you are home-birthing in the UK, you will have access to two and only two pharmaceutical modes of pain relief. These are entonox (gas and air) and pethidine. Personally I LOVE gas and air. Really I think it’s so unfair that we only get access to it when we can’t fully enjoy it. Some people absolutely hate it, and it makes some people feel very sick. My poor best friend with whom I share too much is in that category, she vomited quite spectacularly on a midwife’s head during her labour, thanks to gas and air. But I’ll be honest, gas and air does not take the pain away, not at all. It helps you relax a little, it gives you something to focus on (I think half of it’s success is having the mouth-piece to bite on) and it helps to regulate your breathing.

Now I’m in the camp of people who thinks that pethidine is the devil (The Best Friend with Whom I Share too Much on the other hand LOVED pethidine). I had it when I had my eldest child and I would never take it again. It made me drowsy and insensible and made my daughter very hard to feed after she was born, but for some people it works brilliantly. Again it doesn’t take the pain away, it takes the edge off it, which for some people is just enough space to make the experience much more bearable. Though if you do have pethidine, you won’t be able to get into a birthing pool.

Your decisions about how you hope to manage your pain will inform your shopping list. So you might want to try the following –

  • A TENS machine. Early on in labour these are fantastic and I have always used them to good effect. You can buy one or you can hire them for not too much money. It’s important to get one that is designed for labour though, and has a boost function on it. It’s worth asking about if you can borrow one. In my first home birth I was able to borrow one from the Parent Craft midwives at my local hospital, for my second home birth I borrowed one from the midwife attached to my local Surestart.
  • Hot water bottle – for hot compresses, alternatively you can put ice in a polythene bag and wrap it in a tea towel (or use the old bag of frozen peas wrapped in a tea towel) for a cold compress.
  • Massage oils – friction is never good, especially in labour. http://www.birthease.co.uk sell a nice range of reasonably priced birth massage oils. I like the smell of them, they have lavender, jasmine and clary sage oil. Lovely.
  • Birthing ball – these are fab to have WELL before D-Day. They are excellent for all sorts of things, helping the baby to get into position, improving your posture, relieving strain on your back, your hips etc. Move about on the birth ball in labour help the baby to descend and rotate and helps you to feel on top of the pain. I delivered my last two babies leaning over a birthing ball.

Nice To Have

These are the things that aren’t really essential, but are nice to have.

  • Bendy straws or ice chips. I always got very thirsty in labour but trying to drink straight from a glass made me feel quite sick. Straws are a good way to sip and keep your fluids up.
  • Essential oils and candles. Again I’d recommend lavender, jasmine, rose or clary sage (for the record my husband HATES the smell of clary sage). Just like with a romantic night in or a hot date, it helps to set the atmosphere. Your labour is reliant in so many ways on the hormone Oxytocin. Oxytocin is the exact same hormone that you release when you are in love or when you orgasm. Oxytocin isn’t a big fan of loud noises and bright lights (unless maybe you’re an exhibitionist).
  • Music – again it’s about setting mood. It doesn’t have to be plinky plonky chill out stuff. I had my iPod on shuffle when labouring with the boy. It had a mixture of chilled out acoustic tracks and some high energy stuff. As it happened, he was born to Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger by Daft Punk.
  • Glucose tablets/honey/flapjacks etc. It’s a good idea to eat when in labour, especially if labour is long. I wouldn’t recommend sitting down to a 3 course meal, but something that is high in energy (not high in fat necessarily, so maybe lay off the dairy), and energy dense, is a good idea for when you need a pick me up.
  • I guess this is essential – some nice snacks for your midwives. They deserve a cup of tea and a biscuit.

The Dull Practicalities.

Finally there are a couple of things that you need to consider.

  • What are you going to wear? I find the £50 Bamboo Birthing Shirts sold by the NCT a bit ridiculous, BUT remember that the first pics of you and your baby will include your labour sartorial choices. Layers is good, at times you will be roasting hot, at times you will be freezing cold. You want something that can easily accommodate access to your business end and to the boobage for those first precious moments of skin to skin/first breastfeeding. It’s helpful to double up on these choices too, because your waters or vomiting or any other myriad of effluvia may conspire to cause a costume change.
  • If you plan to birth in water, a tankini top if always good. You don’t have to have acres of flesh on show.
  • What do you plan to wear after the birth? You need a change of clothes, socks, enormous belly-warming knickers, nursing bras, nursing pads and maternity pads. May I also HIGHLY recommend getting a bottle of witch hazel. Pour some over maternity pads before putting them on. They are amazingly soothing, and mildly antiseptic too.
  • A receiving blanket for baby. Okay let me just amend that to a receiving towel. One of the snuggle robe type ones with the little hood is good.
  • What will baby wear? – I have a few recommendations on these front as well. Little baby body suit type vests with the pop fasteners at the bottom are great, but NOT for a newborn. I prefer a waist length, side fastening vest. The reason being? It won’t press against their umbilicus. Once that falls off standard vests are great. Baby will also need socks (good idea to put several pairs of these on an hour or two before they do they heel prick), a baby-gro/sleep suit, scratch mitts and a hat. Especially a hat. They aren’t great at regulating their temperature early on, though a bit of skin-to-skin kangeroo care does wonders for that.
  • For when the sh*t hits the fan – you need nappies, nappy sacks and cotton wool. Pure water is more than ample at cleaning a baby’s bottom (stay away from the wipes for a while), but it will take a small mountain of cotton wool to get that sticky poop off.

It’s a good idea to have this stuff packed up like a regular hospital bag. It means that it’s all in one place, and should you need to transfer for any reason, it’s easy to grab and take with you.

So there’s my guide to home birthing essentials. Happy shopping.

And we’re back!

Baby is breech again.

Okay I know it’s not a big deal, there’s still a lot of room in there and there’s still plenty of time for many many turnings. I just felt a bit smug when it was head down a few weeks ago, like my clever baby is getting ahead of the curve.

So how do I know baby is head up again?

Well I had a 4D scan on Saturday.

So now I know that baby is head up and that it weighs an estimated 2lbs 11oz which is exactly average for this gestation.

I had a 4D scan when I was pregnant with the boy, but much earlier, at 21 weeks. It was great but he looked pretty skeletal. A 28 week scan was much better for the baby to look like an actual baby. I have to say, I think the baby looks like the boy, most people who have seen the scan pictures agree with me. They both have the same mouth (their daddy’s), they both have chubby cheeks (also like their daddy when he was a baby), the only real difference is the nose. So far the kids have all tended to have a nose similar to mine (I have a fairly small nose), this baby appears to maybe take after the husband’s side of the family.

I finally saw my midwife again. I had a 28 week appointment with her yesterday. It was pretty standard, she took some blood samples to check my iron levels and double check my anti-d status (I don’t get that one, I’ve been A+ all my life, is it suddenly going to change mid-pregnancy???), she measured my fundal height (29 weeks) and BP, and had a listen to the baby’s heartbeat. Thank Buddha she didn’t weigh me. I weighed myself on Sunday and was not happy with the result. I have gained 37lbs. I have a whole trimester to go and I have gained 2lbs more than the absolute upper limit of what I’m supposed to for the whole pregnancy. I have signed up for  myfitnesspal.com now and have started calorie counting. Following Weight Watchers clearly is not working for me (or should I say, NOT following Weight Watchers), it’s just I feel like I’ll scream if I have to look at a points calculator again for a while. My fitness pal has an app so at least I can easily track on the go, plus it’s free so that’s always a bonus. Anyhew here’s a picture of the 28 week bump (don’t mind the fat arms, gah!)

I guess lastly the only thing I have to report is the progress on the home birth front. I was told yesterday I need to go see the consultant at the hospital at 34 weeks so they can rubber stamp me. Sighsville. I’ve been to these appointments before, they literally just look through your notes and say “fine.” I guess I just couldn’t be bothered with the hassle of organising a babysitter (very hard to do when everyone around you works full-time) and getting myself to the hospital and sitting around in a waiting room for something that could be achieved over the phone. Unless of course they recommend against it for some reason…. but hopefully that won’t happen.

I also asked what the situation was re home water births and it appears that 4 years on, the Western Health and Social Services Trust STILL hasn’t managed to train any/many community midwives in it. I was assured when having the boy that they were all being trained, in fact passing them as competent was really just a rubber stamping exercising…. though I’ve got to fair to the midwife I spoke to yesterday, she had a very good attitude and suggested that on the day it was possible that one of my community midwives could swap with one of the midwives from the MLU at the hospital who are well versed in water birth. I won’t hold my breath for that to happen but it was nice to think it’s a possibility.

So that’s all for 28 weeks, but before I go…. here’s a 4D sneak peak of the Poppler.

Halfway there

I laugh when I look back on the optimism I had when I started ttc. I was going to cherish every moment of this pregnancy, I was going to be an earth mother, I was going to dress well, I was going to GLOW.

Ha.

Half way there and I’ve spent most of this pregnancy demented, audibly flatulent (I am an expert at “crop dusting” now, essential in public places), plagued with horrible dry skin/spot outbreaks, panicking about weight gain, living on ranitidine, trying to make my existing clothes work and freaking out at the prospect of having to give birth again. I’m starting to question whether or not I want to home birth this time, all because I made the mistake of reading some of that evil harridan Dr Amy’s blog where she states all babies born at home burst into flames immediately upon delivery or something. I KNOW it’s not true, I KNOW I’m not facing the same issues as American women with regards to my midwife’s qualification, experience and fitness to practise, I’ve done it safely twice before, but all it takes is catching that one episode of One Born Every Minute where the baby had shoulder dystocia and I go into a mental, hormonal flap.

I had a horrible experience giving birth to my eldest in hospital, and two amazing experiences at home, so why am I even contemplating it????

I suppose part of it comes down to this. When I found out I was pregnant with my eldest I went out and bought a couple of pregnancy magazines. We’re going back ten years here so bear with me. The very first one I picked up had an article about water births. I’ve never heard of such a thing, I thought “how amazing! I’d love to do that!” It made sense to me. Fast forward to my booking appointment and I discovered the only way to have a waterbirth would be if the city sank halfway through your labour.

By the time I was pregnant with the boy I bought my own birth pool and was very optimistic it would happen. It seemed like every other women in the UK could have a home waterbirth no problem. I was naive, I thought I would too, but I was told that only one community midwife in the whole the city was trained in waterbirth so I could labour in the pool but I had to get out to push. When he was actually born that was just what happened, the midwives told me they were trained in waterbirth but weren’t signed off on it yet.

In between the boy’s birth and the squishy one coming along, the local hospital opened up there very own fancy dan midwifery unit complete with TWO birthing pools (though only one of them was unusable because whoever designed the place didn’t make the door on one of them wide enough to admit a gurney). Hopefully by now the situation would have changed, right? Well if it hadn’t I intended to sit in the pool no matter what. As it happened, the pool was less than half full when Squishy came shooting out like a human cannonball, so I never found out.

So what do I do this time? Do I risk going to the hospital where they can fill a pool quickly and the staff have all been rubber stamped? Or do I stay at home where I may not get it filled in time or have to argue to stay in it? of course with the hospital there is always the risk that the pools will be occupied or out of order or they’ll decide I’m not a suitable candidate, and there’s the loss of autonomy and the risk of interventions (but I’ll be honest, the loss of autonomy scares me more). I just can’t make up my mind. Luckily I have twenty more weeks to do so.

And twenty more weeks to get a decent wardrobe together, organise a hair cut (see picture below), find a good moisturiser/cleanser and work on not eating everything I can lay my hands on.

I’m sure it’ll fly.